Do you compliment strangers?

I received such a wonderful compliment the other day, and from the most unexpected source - a complete stranger! I work in retail. Not the kind of retail that makes you hate people, thankfully. I work at a store that sells specialty food products and most everyone who comes in is in a good mood. Maybe it’s the free samples that makes people happy. I’d like to think my phenomenal customer service skills always play a part as well.

I was chatting it up with a couple while they tasted their way around the store. I honestly don’t even remember what we were talking about, but it doesn’t take much to get me flapping my lips. The conversation was fun and easy. I remember genuinely laughing, but what was it about? Before leaving the store the man, I never got his name, looked at me and said, “you’ve been blessed with a beautiful personality!” The compliment was so genuine and so completely unexpected that it almost brought me to tears. He couldn’t have known just how much I needed a bit of positivity in my life, because even I was unaware of just how much I needed it. It made my day. My week. My month. And hell since it’s only February, safe to say it made my YEAR!

This got me thinking. Why don’t I ever give strangers compliments?

I often see someone wearing something I like, or witness an interaction that makes me feel good, or have a random conversation that puts a smile on my face. But more often than not, I keep my internal dialog to myself. The positive things I think about total strangers rarely ever leave my mind.

But why?

Why am I so hesitant to say something nice to someone I don’t know?

Surely it has something to do with my own fear. Fear of coming off as a creep. Fear of trying to say something nice that might be interpreted the wrong way. Fear of general interaction with people I don’t know. The more I think about my interactions with people, those who are close to me and those I know nothing about, the more I realize how many are driven by fear.

My fear applies not only to complimenting strangers, but to the millions of times I’ve thought about texting/calling/reconnecting with friends from my past, only to chicken out and not send the text or make the call. Do they even remember me? Are they going to wonder why the heck I’m calling after not speaking for years? Do they even care?

Maybe these all comes down to a fear of being seen. It’s much easier to blend in to the background, or so that’s what I tell myself.