How are you?

I mean that in the genuine friend gazing lovingly into your eyes kind of ‘how are you’? Not the general greeting of the grocery store clerk as they scan your items kind of ‘how are you’. Which, funny enough, is something I recently read about as one of the things Americans do that seem quite weird to people who aren’t American — the use of ‘how are you’ as a general greeting instead of a simple hello.

I don’t mean ‘how are you?’ as in hi or hello though.

I don’t mean how are you ‘during these trying times’ because dear god if I read that expression one more time my head might explode.

I mean how are you?

What is keeping you awake at night?

What is bringing you joy, even if just small amounts?

Who are you missing?

What do you wish you could be doing rather than staying safe and staying inside?

What is giving you hope for the future?

Life is crazy; obviously this year in particular, but if we’re being honest life was pretty crazy even before all the shit hit the fan. The year 2020 is just a magnifying glass that brought all the craziness into clear focus. So take the time to check in on your people. Ask them how they are and give them the time and space to really tell you. Listen. Don’t try to fix or smooth over their problems or complaints. Just be a socially distanced or virtual shoulder to cry on, if need be.

Now tell me, how are you? Feel free to drop it in the comments below or shoot me an email if you feel more comfortable. I’m happy to listen.